Back in the Habit
How a return to work brings fear of a return to form
Most of my blogs will be about tales from past jobs and events from years gone by. This time around I’m sharing something more recent that I’d been anticipating for a while — a return to actual performance work.
And my my my, was I scared.
The end of October saw the return of most of my regular performing outlets — dinner shows, improv and panto. Aside from one dinner show and some background artiste work, this was officially the time to get back to my regular routine before Covid reared its ugly head (I say ugly despite the Spitting Image puppet version being oddly cute).
Panto is regular seasonal work for a lot of performers. It’s a strange belief from a lot of folk that it is something actors do at the end of their career, but I’ve been doing it for the last 16 years.
Okay, that’s not a huge argument for the defence, but I’m sticking with it.
With restrictions playing a part in everyone’s line of work, panto is no exception. The company I’ve worked for in the past six years usually employs plenty of 30–40 actors, grouped together in teams of six or three, to perform multiple tours of schools, social clubs and village halls. This year they had adapted immensely, with three tours of three actors going out to perform two shows (one panto and one show aimed at nursery age children). The tours would have taken place in work bubbles and shows performed with Covid restrictions so high, the children watching would be encouraged to NOT boo and cheer (clapping and stomping being suitable replacements).
The restrictions also ensured that there was a Plan B. In order to accommodate those schools that may not be able to have live performance, one week in October we filmed the panto like a proper movie. While rehearsing we wore face shields, kept distant from each other and even had no-touching choreography for the dances.
Coming back to this style of performance made me realise a few worries I’d had about not being ready. I was gabbling lines, running out of breath at points and generally quite nervous with the script. The thought of not being at the top level I can get to was a big worry. Not only was I feeling out of practice, but the logistics were hugely concerning too, what with the ever-changing tier restrictions.
That last concern was soon realised when the sad news came that the tours had to be cancelled.
However, I am happy I got to film the panto, as it confirmed my other worries were just that — worries. I went from filming onto a dinner show and a bunch of improv showcases, all in front of paying audiences. Any performance nerves are assailed by the ability of most actors to have shows burned onto their brains, so any regular shows can be well remembered. Much of the dinner shows are improvised, with a lot of audience interaction — and so are the improv comedy showcases, funnily enough.
All in all, I need to stop worrying. The long gap between regular live shows has certainly taken its toll, but not anywhere near the level it can get to in one’s own head. I’ve a few shows coming up during Christmas and i know the fear will always be there to an extent, but I have always said if you don’t have nerves for a show, then you don’t care about it.
I obviously care a lot.
If you want to get the filmed panto, you can purchase the stream via http://www.shootingstarentertainments.co.uk/christmas-shows
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